Does sound like you are trying to use the same login simultanously - this is unsupported by tigervnc.
Please see the following topics for instructions
→ [root tip] [How To] TigerVNC Quick Setup
→ [root tip] [How To] TigerVNC over SSH
display:0 is the console - the root display so to speak.
You specifically state you are using xfce - which in turn comes with lightdm - which defaults to open a session at display:7 (at least that is how I remember it)