This is not a support request, I’ve already solved my problem. But I want to open this so that others encountering the same issue can find it and not suffer like I did 
Unfortunately Intel has a habit of breaking AX20x series wifi/bluetooth chips with updates to iwlwifi. This issue has been encountered in may places, the most comprehensive documentation of this can be found here. Typically the issues with bad firmware manifest themselves as unstable bluetooth connections, frequent bluetooth/wifi drops and really bad wifi/bluetooth coexistence. If you are encountering such issues, the recommendation is to use downgrade to select a version of linux-firmware that works and block any future updates. You can use the table in this link to find a “good” version, personally I’m froze mine at 20220119 because of the recommendation here.
How do I know that my card is affected?
inxi --E tells you the chip you have. For example:
Bluetooth:
Device-1: Intel AX201 Bluetooth type: USB driver: btusb
How do I downgrade iwlwifi?
You can learn about downgrading here: Downgrading packages - Manjaro. I ran:
sudo DOWNGRADE_FROM_ALA=1 downgrade linux-firmware
And selected a version that works. (my recommendation is 20220119, but the full table can be found here: Intel AX20x bluetooth disconnecting intermittently since linux-firmware 20210208 update (#1155) · Issues · PulseAudio / pulseaudio · GitLab)
During the downgrade, you can also exclude linux-firmware from all future updates.
Where can I read more about this?
PulseAudio issues: Intel AX20x bluetooth disconnecting intermittently since linux-firmware 20210208 update (#1155) · Issues · PulseAudio / pulseaudio · GitLab
Ubuntu issues: Bug #1933771 “Bluetooth headset random disconnects AX200” : Bugs : linux-firmware package : Ubuntu
PipeWire issues: Bluetooth connection issues (timeout) (#2181) · Issues · PipeWire / pipewire